Few can deny that the producers at Pixar are capable of taking moviegoers on an emotional journey. Of the 15 Pixar films in the past 20 years, I can’t think of one that didn’t invoke several strong emotions, or a pull on my own heartstrings. They started two decades ago with Buzz and Woody in Toy Story, graduating to Nemo, WALL-E, Lightning McQueen, and most recently Riley of Inside Out. The producers at Pixar certainly understand how to play to the audience’s emotions. Yet, Inside Out was different. The film was about emotions, and how they affected Riley in her tumultuous year that was compressed into 90 minutes. See, Inside Out was the first Pixar Film to make me think about what I was feeling as I was watching the movie. I cried when Bing Bong sacrificed himself so Joy could escape the abyss of the Memory Dump – but why was I crying? Was I crying because Pixar wanted me to cry, or simply because for a few moments I was transported to a more juvenile state where I could express my emotions freely? A week has passed since I saw the film, and I think I have finally realized why I was crying. The tears were the product of fear – a fear of forgetting those memories that I cherish, but are constantly being overwritten by newer memories. Perhaps this stems from a now deceased grandmother who had Alzheimer’s, and would constantly confuse me with my uncles, or worse, not even remember me at all. It was annoying at first, then terrifying, to have all these memories abandoned, forgotten and wiped. The visual depiction in the film was a strong one of bowling ball shaped ‘memories’ darkening and finally turning into dust. I could imagine this happening in the chasms of my own brain at an increasing rate – and the fear that comes along with it.
This realization brought about an internal dialogue on the differences between fear and anxiety. Was it anxiety or fear that drove my thoughts? There is a distinct difference, of fear being an emotional response to an implicit danger, and anxiety being the threat of a perceived danger. This I knew, but I believe the line between the two is not so sharp as some would like to believe. I will try to navigate the divide between fear and anxiety, however Inside Out allowed me to recognize the importance of all emotions – Joy, Sadness, Disgust, Fear and Anger.